What sort of gender issues should I be concerned about?

The media provides numerous examples of gender-related issues that are important to talk about with children. Many times, parents are not aware of the impact that the media can have on their child, nor are they aware of the issues that their child may be learning about. More than anything, it is important for parents to be aware of these issues. Being aware increases the likely hood that a parent will teach their children to be aware of these issues as well. The issues that are particularly important to be aware of include representations of gender in the media, portrayed power structures, and portrayed gender interests.

Representations of gender and Power Structures
Whether intentionally or not, a significant portion of the media almost represents the male gender as superior to the female gender. This representation is often found in children’s television programming, and in children’s literature. More often than not, there are more males than females in these programs and books, the males have better lives, and the women are seen as totally dependent on the men, whether in living situations, or in ability to make decisions.

Even Disney movies provide a clear representation of gender stereotypes.



This video shows how even young children develop stereotypes regarding male/female power structures and gender roles.



In addition, males are rarely portrayed as feeling any form of sadness or fear, nor are they portrayed to have any hobby or occupation that doesn’t fit the stereotypical “male mold” where there isn’t competition or any high expectation set. Conversely, females are often portrayed as passive, and whiny (Indiana 1998).

Many children choose characters in the media they can identify with as role models. The lack of females on television or in children’s literature makes this process more difficult for the child.

Parents can begin to counteract the media’s influence by actively sharing accurate representations of male and female genders with their children. This not only teaches the child what to be aware of, but also teaches the child what a correct representation of gender actually looks like.

Interests by gender
In the media, interests and gender are often split by gender. For example, males are more often portrayed as having interests in science and technology, and rarely as teachers, or nurses. Rarely does one see any children’s literature where a male is portrayed as a school teacher or as a nurse.

Children should be taught early on that possible interests are not defined by imagined or societal gender-boundaries.

When Should I Start Talking To My Kids About Gender Portrayals in the Media?

Studies show that the average American between the ages of 2-18 spends about 5.5 hours with some form of media every day. There's no doubt that starting at an early age, your child will start being influenced by the media about gender roles and portrayals. And, as the Social Cognitive Theory explains, if your children don't learn about mediated media portrayals from you as their parent, they will definitely come to accept those false portrayals as truth.
Listed below are some age-appropriate messages that can be discussed with your children, from the ages of 2-18.
2-6 Years

• Gender Equality
• One of the first building blocks of gender awareness in the media.
• Teach your children that girls and boys are just as equal, even though the shows they might watch may have under represent girls or show them in diminished roles.
• Self-Efficacy
• Teach your young girls that they are just as capable as boys to do certain jobs "when they grow up."
• Teach your child to believe in herself and her abilities at a young age, even when the media might portray boys as being stronger, or smarter than their female peers. Also, teach your young boy to not look down on women who have the same types of jobs as males. 

7-12 Years

• Stereotypes
• Children are able to understand stereotyping more at this age than in their younger years.
• Talk to your children about what a stereotype is - and point out examples in the media that they're exposed to.
• Teach her that it's important to express her unique talents, and not just follow the expected sterotype of a young boys and girl their age -- for example, being beautiful and famous, or macho and violent.
• Role Models
• Most children at this age adopt role models that are prominent in pop culture, who lack moral character and other high-quality characteristics.
• Help your child, and also teach them to find a role model who possesses the characteristics that will help her succeed in life and help her aspire to acquire more characteristics than beauty, sexuality, violence, or male dominance, which is so pervasive in their following teenage years. Look to family, church groups, community leaders, for example, for find positive role models for her.

13-18 Years

• Over Sexualization
• Young girls moving into their adolescent years already face a dramatic drop in self esteem. With the over sexualization of women in the media, they are even more vulnerable to accept the belief that sex is the only way to become popular and get attention. Teaching teenage boys about these fake realities in the media can help prevent them from developing unrealistic expectations and altered views or morality. 
• If parents can constantly discuss this inaccuracy with their children, they'll be less likely to get involved in underage sex, STDs and teen pregnancies.
• Help and support your children in developing other talents and attributes that don't depend on beauty, sex, or popularity -- for example, leadership and service groups, fine arts, sports, etc.
• Body Image
• This video series by Jean Kilbourne, "Killing Us Softly," is a documentary on the over sexualization and unrealistic body images of women portrayed in advertising and the media.
• Adolescent girls who either have role models of unrealistically thin models or are exposed to very thin models in the media have an even higher chance of developing an eating disorder and unhealthy views of their bodies.
• Parents can play a role in combating this issue by discussing and encouraging their teenage daughters to seek a body type that is healthy, but not unrealistically skinny.
• Parents should teach their daughters that not every body shape and size is similar -- teenage girls should feel like they fit in and are accepted in the home environment, even when when the media is telling them to look different.

What and How Should I Teach My Children About Race?!

Should I even bother to teach my children about race? If I don't make it an issue - then shouldn't it not be an issue for them?

Parents should teach their children about race because as parents, you are the first contact children have with the outside world. They grow through m any of their developmental years while still in the home before school, and will learn behaviors, opinions and even prejudices from their parents--without a parent even realizing they are teaching it.



How in-depth should I go when teaching societal issues, such as race to my children?

It really depends on the age and maturity of the child. If they are in school and have multi-racial classmates, they may come home with questions, or you may take them aside privately and talk about the differences of their classmates, neighbors or even characters in the media.
Ex. Disney movies - Mulan, Aladdin, Peter Pan etc.

The important thing is to not discourage their questions, or queries as to why others are different, and show an open heart and mind that they can learn from.

Actions Speak Louder than Words - Week 1

Instead if taking the easy road, talking about race for 10 seconds and checking it off your "good parenting checklist (and counting the years until you have to give the 'birds and the bees' talk), parents should take action and teach young children about differences in race.

The following are ideas to begin multicultural and racial education in the home: they all begin with a verb. A verb that you can focus on week by week, and teach your children as you learn together about different races.

Week 1: EXPOSE

• Expose your children to different cultures. Big cities are wonderful cultural centers. In your own city you can find parades, festivals, art museums, and other multicultural events. Usually information is listed in a newspaper, library to town/city hall.
• Activities like this can prompt questions, and good parent-child discussions where you can share lessons and teach them about different countries, people and cultures.
  

A.S.LW. - Week 2

Week 2: Suggest

Suggest to your child that he invite someone racially different over to play. It's an opportunity for your child to make another friend and for you to meet his parents and get acquainted.
Doing this will help your child begin to learn that playing or talking to people who do not necessarily look like them is fine and it is OK to be different.

* This talk might need a reinforcement after how the importance of not talking to strangers - stress that it is OK to play with children who are of difference races.

A.S.L.W. - Week 3

• Week 3: Teach and Trace
• Teach your child about his/her own ethnic heritage.How are they supposed to learn about other people's ethnic heritage when they know nothing of their own - or that they even have one! Everybody is ethnic! We all came from somewhere; when we talk about multi-ethnic, people think that only means people of color.
• Caucasians need to recognize their own diversities and learn about their family's heritage—whether it's German, Swedish, Greek, English, Irish, or whatever.
• Trace where Grandma and Grandpa came from. If they are from the Netherlands, pull out the Dutch shoes (or get a pair) and learn about Dutch people. You can make some Dutch food and practice Dutch customs. If you are from the Islands of the Sea, or far away - pull out the globe and help your children find those places on the Earth.
  

A.L.S.W. - Week 4:

Week 4: Encourage and Find
Encourage schools and churches to teach racial reconciliation. Urban public school systems deal with diversity, and some have provided sensitivity training for teachers. For small towns, or private schools it may be a tougher subject to deal with. You may be surprised with how influential you can be as a parent. Take your concerns and racial sensitivity questions and go to a School Board Mtg and be heard.

Find multi-ethnic media. Public libraries and school usually offer many international and multicultural books. They will have material and picture books available for all ages of a developing child. Take your child to the bookstore or library and choose some books themselves. They will be excited to read them with you if they have experience a sense of ownership in choosing their entertainment material.